Before we begin, the first rule that should always be remembered is that you are dining out for a reason. Don’t forget what that reason or occasion is. Don’t let the “do’s and don’ts” of the formal dining experience weigh you down to the point that you do not enjoy your experience.

There are many facets to proper behavior to display at a restaurant, so I have broken it down simply to ensure you have the proper level of knowledge from when you walk through the door to leaving the tip.

Timing is everything: Restaurant reservations should be treated like any other appointment. Call ahead if you are going to be more than 15 minutes late. If you are later than what you communicated to the restaurant staff, you can expect a longer delay upon arrival or even a cancellation on the restaurants behalf. Be on time and conscious of the restaurant’s scheduling protocol.

Attire: Even if a restaurant has a “casual” dress code, remember the definition of “casual” can mean one thing to one person and a something completely different to another. For some, casual could be interpreted as holey jeans and sneakers; on the other hand it could mean kaki pants and penny loafers. The best rule of thumb when dressing for a restaurant is to do so conservatively. If you think maybe you shouldn’t wear sneakers, don’t! If you are still in doubt simply contact the restaurant staff and ask what would be appropriate attire dining at their establishment.

Arrival at the table: Do not order any food until your entire party arrives. A lot of restaurants will not even seat a partial party. So it is a good idea to get your entire group together at the lounge and be ready to be seated at your scheduled reservation time. Once you have been seated, some restaurants will served bread or a small appetizer. If you are the host of the group, be the last to partake; and never eat the last of anything on the table.

Table Setting: When ding at a fine restaurant, most people are intimidated by all of the silverware and glasses they see sprawled before them. As a basic rule of thumb is to start from the outside of the setting and work your way in. The smaller utensils are used for appetizers and salads, while the larger ones are used for the entrée itself.

Depending on the type of restaurant, you may see five or more glasses in front of you. Don’t worry about which one you use however. The wait staff will fill the appropriate glasses and remove the rest depending on what you order. For example, you will have a tall glass for white wine, a large round glass for red wine, a water glass, and a flute for champagne. If you order wine for the table, like a nice white wine, then all glasses except for your water glass and the appropriate wine glass will remain. This brings us to our next point, selecting the best wine for both your meal and your budget.

Wine Selection: Most people are not quite sure how to choose a wine that compliments the meal and the occasion, even as it matches their budget. If you are not sure, it is quite acceptable to ask the for the wait person’s or wine steward’s advice Once your selection arrives at your table, it will be corked at your table.

If you choose a red wine, the wine server will uncork the win and pour a small amount into the host’s glass and the server will leave the bottle on your table. If you are the host, don’t drink the wine in your glass, and don’t pour the wine into your glass if you are a guest. The server is allowing the wine to breathe and will return in about five minutes. When the server arrives, sparingly taste the wine to see if it is what you expected. If so, say something complimentary like, “thank you, very nice.” The server will then fill the rest of your glass and your guest’s glasses.

If you choose a white wine, the tasting process will be similar to the red wine, with the exception of the breathing process. White wine can be tasted and enjoyed upon its corkage.

If you have a special wine of your own that you would like to enjoy at the restaurant, most venues allow you to bring in your own selection for a nominal corking fee.

The Meal: This will be covered very briefly, as the manners you were taught as a child should suffice. Eat slowly and in small bites, allow time for conversation and make sure not to rush your guests.

If your entrée is not properly cooked or is not too your satisfaction, it is acceptable to graciously inform the server there was an error in your meal. While some chefs have earned reputations of being temperamental in their craft, they are professional artists who will take your comments as positive and ensure your meal is prepared to your satisfaction.

Tipping: Tipping can be a tricky subject. Generally, you should tip leave about 15 percent of the bill as your tip. While it may not be easy to calculate the tip in your head, do not bring out a calculator. Instead, double the amount owed on the tax, and you will be able to arrive at a figure which generally comes out to 15 percent of the bill. But don’t forget to take the level of service into consideration. If the service was acceptable, a 15 percent tip should suffice, however, if you received excellent service, you should consider tipping more, and leave a 20 to 30 percent tip.

Following these very simple hints will allow you to be the captain of the table and maybe even impress your guests with your extensive knowledge of the fine art of dining; even though you may be sweating under your casual jacket.

Bon Apetit!

One Response to “RESTAURANT DINING: Fumbling Through Appropriate Etiquette”

1. wine tasting Says:
   October 15th, 2006 at 11:54 pm

   The best rule of thumb when dressing for a restaurant is to do so conservatively

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